For this lesson, create at least 5 comic page layouts, using your script. You can always make more if you'd like to, or would find it helpful to do so. Take a look at what you've made, and select the layout you think is best. Which one does the most effective job of bringing the script to life, and why?
And if you’ve chosen a script page that’s not one of the three example scripts we provided in the previous lesson, post it so we can see the script you’re working from!
For this comic book assignment, I made five 4’’x6’’ layouts based on 16 thumbnails. These layouts are based on all three pages of the script.
There was no way to top David Finch’s take on page one (the superhero pages), but I decided to draw it anyway because “there is a difference between knowing the path and walking the path.” It was a valuable experience, especially the establishing shot.
On page two (the mad scientist), I was at first stumped until I remembered that when horror comics were popular in the 50s, it was common in that genre to only have two or three panels per third of the page. This layout is an homage to that older horror style, but with more modern camerawork like Dutch angles.
Finally, there is page 3, the action scene. This scene was the most fun to adapt because it required the most problem solving. The script is supposed to be a faulty one that asks for the impossible. Reinterpreting the script was a good challenge. I tried many different approaches in my thumbnails, from conventional designs to artsy ones that were circular or diagonal. Finally, I made the two action scene layouts seen below. My favorite of the two is the first (the one where the main character has a mustache) because it was not based on any thumbnail. Rather, it boiled down the scene to what I considered its essentials. Everything, from the number and size of panels to the angles and compositions used is purposeful and meant to realize the action of the script in as direct and clear a way as possible. Hopefully, I succeeded! In the second version, the main difference is that I had the main character throw the briefcase instead of dropping it.
Overall, my favorites are the Mad Scientist layout and the first action scene layout. Which do you like best? In what ways could I improve?
Hi,here are my comic page layouts,for the first image i used the second page from David's scripts.Here i would choose the second sketch.For the second image i used David's third example script,here i choose the first sketch.For the third image i used my own script,here my choise is the first,or the fourth sketches. Here is my script:
"Anh'blei(not final title)" - Karafa Roland
PAGE 1: Six Panels
Panel One:
We open with an establishing shot of a big kingdom,its surrounded by huge unreachable mountains with only one entrance.The whole kingdom is having a cascading build,the highest place is the main square that is right before the castle.On the middle of the square there is a huge fountain with a statue,the whole square is looking stunning.
Maludrin: Kea'l Siren,the Shield of Erosgul.
Panel Two:
We have a closer look at the Square and the castle with more focus on the square,we can see that there are many people on the square,it is some kind of a festival.This is a human kingdom,but we can see many kind of races on the streets enjoing the event.
Maludrin: The people of Kea'l Siren are enyoing the DARKSTAR FESTIVE...
Panel Three:
The folks are enjoying the festival,some elf girl are dancing in the fountains water,there are also some children playing in the water. There are a couple standing in front of a vendors stand.
Maludrin: And they have no idea...
Panel Four:
Here we have a closer look at the elf girl in the fountain,she is very attractive looking with a smile on her face as she dancing.
Eronil: Let them celebrate, MALUDRIN. They deserve it.
Panel Five:
Now our focus is on the castle,its a huge building built on a big mountain's cliff wall. Its giant structure rises above us.From the square, big stairs leads to the castle entrance. Two guards protecting the entrance.
Maludrin: As they deserve to KNOW that soon Kea'l Siren will PERISH!
Panel Six:
We move closer to the castle's entrance with the guards.
Seredin: Not just Kea'l Siren,but all EROSGUL.
Hey @Roland Karafa ! Good work, not only did you rough-in layouts for three scripts, you even made your own script!
I think you made good choices for the scripts that David provided, I'm excited to see the final versions of these! As for the layouts you made of your own script, I think (1) and (4) are good choices, but I'm a little concerned that (1) might get a little cluttered in the final version. That said, my favourite layout is (3), as I feel that it gives you the best space for the descriptions in your script.
Looking forward to seeing the finalised versions of these! And of course, as I am a beginner, please take my word with a grain of salt.
Here are my five passes at laying out the page. I chose the second page that David provided.
My initial thought was to end the page dramatically with the scientist leaving the scene, so with my first attempt I laid things out to lead to that moment.
For attempt 2, i reread the script and realized i missed that the last panel is supposed to be through the lens of the camera. I also changed the angle and sizing of panel five to make it more dramatic.
On attempt 3 I did some editing of the script. We are given a description of the building from the outside, then immediately given a new description of the inside where the scene actually takes place. I decided to cut the outdoor panel to make the page more concise. also changed the angle of the clawed hand again. This new angle allowed me to showcase some violence and action. I think it really energizes the the page. After looking at the page as a whole though, I realized the focus goes straight down the page
On Attempt 4, I went all in on the claw. I feel that choosing to focus on it really gave the page a central moment to work around. I also tried to combine panels 1 and 2 from the script. The idea is to establish the lab in the foreground, and have the proko sign in the background outside a window.
For the last attempt, I decided to do what I was told and bring back the panel of the building.
I personally like either 4 or 5 the most. The one I'd choose to work would depend on the rest of the story. If it's important, or difficult to figure out where the scene takes place, I would pick 5. If not, I would go with 4.
What do you think of my thought process? Are there details that I'm missing or should focus on more? Where do you disagree with me?
Cool! I love how you depicted the hand crushing the computer in layouts 4 and 5. I never imagined anything like that when I interpreted the same script. It’s so dramatic! Having a shadow grow and consume the scientist was also a good touch. The panel introducing the scientist in the first layout was also very good, though I understand why it was cut from later versions to better highlight more dramatic parts of the scene.
Like the other commenters, I consider number five the best. That said, I wonder if a version like layout number 5, but with a panel 2 like the one found in the first layout would be even better. The panel 2 layout 5 currently has is good for clear storytelling, but a medium shot could better establish lab room where the experiment is being made.
Overall, great job! Keep it up!
Hi there @monkeyxmonkey ! Nice work on the assignment!
My personal pick is (5), since overall it’s the most polished layout-wise and matches the brief the best! I think the establishing shot eases the reader into the scene better than just jumping into the action. That said, I thought that panels 2-4 on version (2) portrays the scientist injecting himself in the most dynamic and dramatic way. Personally, I think that combining the panel layout of (5) with the dynamic actions and poses of panels 2-4 on (2) would look nice.
Good work once again! Of course, feel free to take my word with a grain of salt. While I’ve drawn a few comic pages myself, I’m still very much a beginner!
I’m a comic book artist for Image, Marvel, DC, and others.
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For this lesson, create at least 5 comic page layouts, using your script. You can always make more if you'd like to, or would find it helpful to do so. Take a look at what you've made, and select the layout you think is best. Which one does the most effective job of bringing the script to life, and why?
And if you’ve chosen a script page that’s not one of the three example scripts we provided in the previous lesson, post it so we can see the script you’re working from!