"The Adventure" I'd love a critique!
3yr
Rubén Frutos
Hey folks! Here's my latest piece. A keyframe I did for the Instagram account @24hr_keyframes (Altough not really, cause I'm way passed the deadline). The second image is the brief they gave for this challenge.
I'd love to know some of your thoughts on the piece and how I can improve it. Thanks!!
Asked for help
Here's the new version after @Steve Lenze 's critique. I actually went back to my color sketch, and touched it up a bit. Which means that I screwed up trying to "render" the bg and got carried away with contrast and detail. Thanks a lot for the critique!! It helped me out a lot.
I'd still love to know what you guys think about it!!
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3yr
This is gorgeous, @Rubén Frutos! Lovely concept, great scene. I feel like the color choices really match the idea described in the brief. Very assertive value design too.
I see @Steve Lenze already gave you some precious help - I like this new version better too! Great job!
I understand your goal was to design a keyframe, but I see a few character related things which I believe I’d spend some more time on - since you asked for feedback, and this is supposed to be a character-focused shot, I figured you might like me to mention:
. The pose of the bear. To me, it feels a bit like he’s lifting his paw, but is standing still on the same spot (like a “fake walk”) - I think I’d go after some reference to make it look like he’s in an active forward motion, walking or maybe even slightly running.
. The girl’s facial expression. Since the story is about the beginning of a big adventure, I imagine it would be nice to make her look a lot more excited and happy, maybe with wide open eyes, a hopeful and confident smile showing through. I think I’d also change her body language to match this excitement, perhaps push her torso forward, tense up her legs just a little, pull her hands a bit upward closer to her heart?
That’s it - hope it helps.
Best regards!
Hey Ruben,
This is real nice and has a real calm feel about it. I think the thing that jumps out to me is that all the edges in the piece are hard and sharp. Because hard, sharp edges come forward, the mountains, buildings, trees and characters all start to look like they are on the same plane. You are lacking what is called "atmospheric perspective" things become less defined and take on the color of the sky the farther back they are in the background. I hope this helps :)
Thanks, Steve! I guess I could emphasize the atmospheric perspective in the plane with the hills and the town. Good point! Thanks
