Practice page
1yr
Matthew Manghi
I’m working on some practice pages. Here’s the first one. Written/illustrated/lettered by me.
Hey Matthew
Cool page, and nice drawings.
I only had one thing that stood out to me, and that is the sign of the bar and door. I think that to establish them, you should have them appear in the first panel. I know you have the little flag at the top, but it gets lost and is not near the center of interest, which is where people are going to look first.
Just a thought :)
•
1yr
This is awesome! Fun visual storytelling leading the eye through the world, great shot of the character which naturally leads the eye up to the door of the bar! Well done! My suggestion would be to make this page 2! You have a great page turn panel where Silas smashes through the door, it makes me want to know what happens next! So much of your first panel is mostly covered by your lettering and it's a great shot with a lot of opportunities for some more visual cues about the environment. You could start panel 1 of this page with "This duty as led me here in search of the shards of the Elder Sigil" where you see Silas finding the clue in the street, and use the rest of the panel 1 narration for an awesome Page 1 establishing Arkham Massachusetts, Miskatonic Library, maybe tease some of the horrors to come, and introduce Silas in his role as Librarian. I wasn't sure if the first panel on this page was the ruins of Miskatonic Library, or out in the world. Can't wait to see more, keep it up!